I used to be really uptight (OK, I’m still a little uptight), but during my pregnancy I was even more high strung than usual. I read 32 pregnancy and childbirth books, scrolled through all the things on all the mama sites and made a lot of lists.
I convinced myself that the more I planned and prepped, the birth would be easier. I convinced my body that if I ate the right foods, my birth would be easier. And I convinced my partner that if we mastered all the birth positions and massage techniques, the birth would be easier.
I moved into birth with this rigid plan.
But, when I went into labor and didn’t have more than twenty seconds between contractions, I thought something must be wrong because “This wasn’t part of the plan.”
But, nothing was wrong; I was just having a baby.
I resisted the unpredictability of my birth experience for the first three hours, continually forcing myself onto that dang birth ball, or sniffing essential oils that were making me nauseous. But, the ball and oils were on my list, so sit and sniff I did.
On top of being exhausted, my cervix was being stubborn and I was devastated that all my planning seemed worthless.
Then, my sweet partner Eric smoothed my sweaty hair back, leaned in and whispered, “Just surrender. You don’t need to do anything else.”
